Anyone who knows me has noticed that I have OCD. For those of you unacquainted with this particular condition, it’s Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. I’ve never been diagnosed (I’ve never had the funds to actually get myself into therapy, which is unfortunate), but it’s sort of obvious. If I can’t quite remember if I pulled the parking brake on a bus, I drop everything to go back to the school late at night to confirm that I did. Despite the fact that I’ve never actually forgotten to pull the parking brake, I’ve had to check several times. My mind can’t let go of tiny details—I’ve backtracked to make sure I turned in paperwork, if I put away a dish, whatever else. If I can’t quite recall if I put something away in its proper place, I have to double check.
My natural absentmindedness exacerbates this portion of my personality. For obvious reasons.
As one can imagine, my work spaces tend towards the immaculate. I dust, reorder my tools on a nearly daily basis, and usually run everything over with a Clorox wipe to boot. Anyone who knows me has teased me about my “type A” personality and habits.
Imagine their surprise, then, when they visit my writing desk. When one sees the papers, folders, various knickknacks, wires, fabric (that one’s kind of hard to explain), family pictures, glue sticks, notebooks, headphones, staplers, loose staples, electric tape, regular tape, phone books, and other accoutrements floating in piles or tucked underneath shelves or hidden behind other items….well, it’s like observing a sort of ecosystem. One untouched by human interference.
I never said I made sense.
Sadly, my bedroom isn’t much better. I always keep my floor cleared of clutter, but I pile all sorts of crap on every item of furniture I own. Conditions are slightly better than they were during my teenage years. I at least put away my laundry now. Books, jewelry, stuffed animals….not so much. They pretty much get stuck on a shelf and get left there for a decade or two.
You might find this just another excuse for laziness, but this actually promotes my writing habits. When I see a clean desk, I put off writing and get easily distracted watching cat videos online or a new Korean drama (they’re addictive). When I see a not-so-clean desk, I put off cleaning to get some writing done.
By procrastinating on one task, I accomplish another one.
Like I said, I never made sense.
Picture from Quotesgram